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Bill Gates recently compared the computer industry with the auto industry
stating "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
GM issued the following press release as a response:
"If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would be driving cars with
the following characteristics…"
- For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
- Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a
new car.
- Occasionally, your care would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
would accept this, restart, and drive on.
- Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your
car to shut down and refuse to restart; in which case you would have to
reinstall the engine.
- Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought ‘Car95’ or
‘CarNT’. Then you would have to buy more seats.
- Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was more reliable,
five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only run on two
percent of the roads.
- The oil, water, temperature, and alternator warning lights would be
replaced by a single ‘general car fault’ warning light.
- New seats would force everyone to have the same butt size.
- The airbar system would say ‘Are you sure..?’ before going off.
- Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned
the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
- GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand
McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them
nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the
car’s performance to diminish by 50 percent or more.
- Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn how
to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same
manner as the old car.
- You’d press the ‘Start’ button to shut off the engine.
Chuckles and grins...
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